The Gift of Connection
June, 2009
by Angelique Devost
Morella and I just returned from a wonderful family vacation. Our father turned 70 last month and to celebrate he and his wife, Lara, took us on a 9-day Caribbean cruise — four generations, 17 of us in all!
I didn’t know what to expect when we set out. It had been 15 years since we last took a family vacation together. Frankly, I wondered about the dynamics of spending so much time with family. Would we still like each other when the trip was over?
What unfolded over the next nine days was really quite beautiful. The Caribbean Princess is a very large ship with a wide variety of activities, so our group was often spread out. We congregated each evening in the dining room for dinner, mixing up who sat with whom at the three tables we occupied. It felt great to sit down and share a meal together, but my favorite gatherings were on the large balcony off of Dad and Lara’s suite at the back of the ship. These were informal, festive gatherings that included champagne toasts, occasional cigar smoking, and the planning of activities at our next island stop.
With each passing gathering, I could feel the energy of our group gel as be bonded closer together. It felt so wonderfully wholesome and so essential to my own sense of belonging. This was my clan, my tribe, and it was so fulfilling to connect with them in this way. How rare it is for large families to spend this kind of time together.
For his 70th birthday, our father gave us a very precious gift — the time and space in which we could connect with each other at a depth that is unlikely when we gather only for several hours a few times each year. I am feeling immensely grateful for the opportunity.
The experience of bonding with family is very enriching and empowering. It has made me feel much stronger within myself by affirming that I am not alone. I encourage you to look at what important family and friend relationships are suffering from neglect, and give yourself the gift of reconnecting with these people. You will experience a joy and richness that will remind you that we are all connected to one huge, beautiful human family. As Giovanni on the Caribbean Princess told us in his heavy Italian accent, “It’s good for you, it’s good for us, it’s good for everybody!”